Recent reviews by Choir of VVolves

There's a quest called "Shoot This Guy in the Face" given to you by "Face McShooty" yelling "Shoot me in the face" where you're required to shoot a guy in the face.

10/10 would shoot again

The most realistic Bush administration Katrina simulator on the market.

10/10.

The Typing of The Dead: Overkill will have you input random phrases to see gore, nudity, and fantastic depravity on your screen.

Ultimately, it's like Google, but with better graphics and sans any NSA/FBI DRM.

10/10

Games for Windows Live has gone hollow.

praisethesun/10

EDIT: By the way, don't think about going BACK to GFWL (I know what you're thinking, why would you do that? Because of certain multiplayer things when the beta was launched!), because you'll lose your achievements and get corrupted data. Which officially makes GFWL the hardest boss in the series.

got100%twicebecauseofthat/10

While the story borrows some really fantastic concepts from Norse mythology and starts with a bang, you're promised a Saga and receive a segment. There is no finality to this game, and you're ultimately left with an extremely shallow version of Final Fantasy Tactics with units who max at level five and some beautiful locations / characters who are left hopelessly vague.

I bought this game when it went down to $15 after being released from like $30, and it was by far the worst decision I had made during any Steam Sale. I can say that as somebody who hasn't bought into too many Early Access titles. Download a background or two, watch a video on YouTube, just don't make the same mistake I did.

EDIT: Some nice brony just pointed out my review is bull and they have a sequel coming later in the year. Great idea, spend another $30 to walk characters over more backgrounds. Even more of a downvote than I previously had.

EDIT #2: Hey look, the second game is out and even worse than this one in many ways. LOL GO GO FANBOI FEVER

I purchased this game when the first episode came out, already knew what I was getting into with Telltale and therefore kept my mouth shut as I waited... and am now shocked to see the user reviews for this to be "Overwhelmingly Positive".

The first two episodes (of five total) feel the most coherent, but are riddled with the illusion of choice. Conversations and decisions that you make throughout the game have no true relevance other than a characters change in appearance or a different line of dialogue. There is no substance here to call this game a point and click adventure, it's an extremely limited narrative where every episode has one 'major' decision branching point, and you can never lose or go off the rails. Really. Try it.

Episodes four and five are escapism at best: everything the game has led you to believe it was interested in is complete and TWAU can now stay on rails. There is officially no more "investigation" or detective work to play by this point, and it feels like the staff made a conscious decision NOT to put any work into these two chapters, but instead to make them the all about a big story "dilemma" that turns out to be not really such a dilemma. Moreso than The Walking Dead, which is how most people are now into TellTale games, the "moral dilemmas" here are little more than talking points. Maybe it's set and setting, but the zombie epoch makes the violent life or death situations have a wide degree of colors and emotions, whereas in The Wolf Among Us, Bigby plays his very nature in a fantasy town that is knowledgable and accepting of his actions, good or bad, black or white. It's not like Clementine in The Walking Dead never being exposed to anything or having to grow up quickly, instead you get this situation where everybody just knows Bigby can be an ******* and by the end of the game you're either not an ******* or everybody is fine with you being an *******. That could be the best thing about the final chapter: if you've played this kind sweet hearted little red riding Bigby, your character still unleashes (both his avatar and rage) on a specific fantasy character to almost no catharsis whatsoever, just continues another cute wheel conversation afterwards.

For a game that's all about wanting to feel like a movie/novel, being shallow is crippling. Maybe the deepest section is the end. At the end, the game gives you one final decision: "Follow" or "Not Interested" and doesn't play to either of these requests and recommends that you buy the actual graphic novel in order to continue the adventure. Perfect slap in the face, I was just thinking that most Choose your Own Adventure! books contain more content than this. We're sheep for spending over $10 on this cute little illustrated cartoon that wants me to believe that my decisions make a difference.

Read it instead.

CGI Metal Gear Solid with Japanese themes where you can kill a man by scaring him off of a high surface.

10/10.

Laura is physically beaten the entire storyline, emotionally breaks down and cries when she kills another human being for the first time, and then proceeds to kill about a thousand extras in the course of 24 hours.

10/10

A: IT'S NOT DARK SOULS
B: IT'S NOT DEMON SOULS
C: 0/10 DIFFICULTY RATING
D: 0/10 WOULD NOT BUY