I. What. Oh god. My brain. This game. Where do I. What do I. I don't even.

Okay, get a grip. You've seen crazy before. You've read crazy before in books, calm down, this is fine, everything is fine, take the pills, breathe. Relax, relax. Okay, Dark Scavenger - Roleplaying game, mostly a point and click with turn based combat, though without levelling (that's handled with the loot you gain opening up progressively more and more powerful tools as the game progresses), where you play the part of "an human" who for some reason ended up in space, alone, with naught but a spacesuit on. At least, I hope you've a space suit on. You meet a creature called "Den", a big giant spacefaring blob, who beats you up and leaves you for dead.

When you come around you find yourself on a ship home to three alien scavengery sorts, who immediately promote you, you lucky soul, to general gopher, and person who's going to get beaten senseless. In exchange, they agree to convert any loot you find into items that will surely help you to help them keep their rickety little spaceship going. Cue the game proper beginning. You are told that the ship is nearly out of fuel but thankfully the planet nearby happens to have a fuel source, unfortunately, it's in the hands of the bandits. You've been told that you're off to get the fuel, in exchange for your continued passage on the ship, and the services of your three newfound friends.

Mechanically, you move from room to room, represented by static screens with highlighted "hot spots" which bring up text style choose your own adventure style dialogs, depending on what you pick you may end up in combat situations, or you may gain items, or gain life / lose life, or even end up dead. Such is the way of the game, the events are far, far off the insane end of the spectrum, and you'll quickly find that your arsenal will consist of things that shouldn't make sense, whilst fighting things that make no sense.

There is a story in the madness somehow, in so much as your arrival may well change events which are playing out on the planet you've just landed on, but given the madness inherent in what you're playing it's a bit hard to make out all the fine details when you end up creating "your mother" as an ally (no, not a joke, you can summon your mother as an ally, and she stuns all opponents if you're at low health). The best way to enjoy this game is to take it on it's own terms, almost as a Hitchhiker's guide with fighting thrown in, for the ridiculously low price point - it's a steal, and an easy sell in my book, for any RPG fan.

Just don't play this game on any psychoactive or hallucinogenic substances.

I. What. Oh god. My brain. This game. Where do I. What do I. I don't even. Okay, get a grip. You've seen crazy before. You've read crazy before in books, calm down, this is fine, everything is fine, take the pills, breathe. Relax, relax. Okay, Dark Scavenger - Roleplaying game, mostly a point and click with turn based combat, though without levelling (that's handled with the loot you gain opening up progressively more and more powerful tools as the game progresses), where you play the part of "an human" who for some reason ended up in space, alone, with naught but a spacesuit on. At least, I hope you've a space suit on. You meet a creature called "Den", a big giant spacefaring blob, who beats you up and leaves you for dead. When you come around you find yourself on a ship home to three alien scavengery sorts, who immediately promote you, you lucky soul, to general gopher, and person who's going to get beaten senseless. In exchange, they agree to convert any loot you find into items that will surely help you to help them keep their rickety little spaceship going. Cue the game proper beginning. You are told that the ship is nearly out of fuel but thankfully the planet nearby happens to have a fuel source, unfortunately, it's in the hands of the bandits. You've been told that you're off to get the fuel, in exchange for your continued passage on the ship, and the services of your three newfound friends. Mechanically, you move from room to room, represented by static screens with highlighted "hot spots" which bring up text style choose your own adventure style dialogs, depending on what you pick you may end up in combat situations, or you may gain items, or gain life / lose life, or even end up dead. Such is the way of the game, the events are far, far off the insane end of the spectrum, and you'll quickly find that your arsenal will consist of things that shouldn't make sense, whilst fighting things that make no sense. There is a story in the madness somehow, in so much as your arrival may well change events which are playing out on the planet you've just landed on, but given the madness inherent in what you're playing it's a bit hard to make out all the fine details when you end up creating "your mother" as an ally (no, not a joke, you can summon your mother as an ally, and she stuns all opponents if you're at low health). The best way to enjoy this game is to take it on it's own terms, almost as a Hitchhiker's guide with fighting thrown in, for the ridiculously low price point - it's a steal, and an easy sell in my book, for any RPG fan. Just don't play this game on any psychoactive or hallucinogenic substances.