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The only thing I regret about the time I've wasted playing this game is that I don't have more time to waste playing this game..

The problematic-for-many-reasons second part doesn't at all make up for or make it okay that you'll spend the first half of this game expecting the FBI to show up at your door.

It's a cute concept but I spent an hour putting up with this girl's emotional baggage. The whole time is her messaging me with vague comments and then it's my job to lead the conversation and get her to tell me what's wrong. That's pretty ♥♥♥♥♥♥ and manipulative and if you're the only one driving the conversation all the time, the person is just. not. into. you.

Apparently, this turns out to be true no matter what you do. Your whole purpose in Emily's life is to be her therapist and fix her sads. Oh, and her rebound, which ends up being your fault.

Years and years after my first game of the Sims, I'm still finding new ways to murder them.

This game is about a bunch of people in a dystopian universe. The Rebellion leader "Bain" speaks to you through unknown means, directing to you do carry out orders to bring the Organisation to its knees. The Organisation, also known as Gen-Sec or General Security, brings you a safer world by taking away any autonomy of the people; you can see their mind control in even the way the people walk, going between the same places with a glazed look in their eyes. A peaceful existence is gauranteed, at least until you, under the guidance of Bain, start causing a disturbance that must be rectified.

GenSec will send in wave after wave of cloned fighters to stop you, and if you're caught, you will be held in custody for Re-education. But Bain is too strong and his influence will have you out of their prison in about 2-3 minutes or so, usually in exchange for a clone. I don't know why - they have an unending supply and can just make more, yet they have disregard for the civillian population as they attempt to mow down everything that moves with a laser beam of death mounted on top of a van.

Occasionally, an Organisation leader will show up to cheerlead the clones. Upon exploding his friends, he will retreat because his position is too important to risk his life, even for the cause he believes in. The world needs him.

Anyway, if you keep carrying out crimes against the GenSec, you can overthrow the evil GenSec organisation and free the world. The more money you steal or earn through underground means, the more power you have and the more characters will join your rebelious faction. Be careful not to do any of the drugs you're stealing to fund the cause and build up your base - you've already started to hallucinate a lot of dead people, walking around and talking like their normal people.

Fix drill.
Play slots.
Play slots.
Fix drill.
Shoot cops.
Fix drill.
More slots.
Shoot cops.
Tase everything in the face.
More slots.

Move bags.
And move bags.
And move bags.
Infinity.

* I will never forget to go here with Transporter Aced instead of drillskillz again.

He sang Lionel Richie to the pager operator.

So worth it.

Chicks with the longest toenails I've ever wielded as a weapon.
Got a flare gun and went pyro on a bunch of ♥♥♥♥♥ ravers on the beach.
Did some arts and crafts projects with cannibal parts that Martha Stewart would be proud of.
Grew some weed.
10/10

Walking in the Dark Simulator. 0/10 Would not recommend to my friends.

Ingredients: Wandering, walls, annoying disembodied voice, random noises, walking, wandering, strolling, jogging, sprinting, power walking, and glowsticks.
Does not contain anything scary, anything inovative, or... anything.

May contain nuts.