Recent reviews by The Lobotomizer

The game has finally reached a state where I'd say it's definitely worth trying, and each new update is looking to be more promising than the last. Could use some more reworks long term but there is fun to be had within the current state

hot vampire

Bingo is a game of chance in which each player matches the numbers printed in different arrangements on cards. The game host (a caller) draws at random, marking the selected numbers with tiles. When a player finds the selected numbers are arranged on their card in a row, they call out "Bingo!" to alert all participants to a winning card, which prompts the game host (or an associate assisting the host) to examine the card for verification of the win. Players compete against one another to be the first to have a winning arrangement for the prize or jackpot. After a winner is declared, the players clear their number cards of the tiles and the game host begins a new round of play.

Alternative methods of play try to increase participation by creating excitement. Since its invention in 1929, modern bingo has evolved into multiple variations, with each jurisdiction's gambling laws regulating how the game is played. There are also nearly unlimited patterns that may be specified for play. Some games require only one number to be matched, while cover-all games award the jackpot for covering an entire card. There are even games that award prizes to players for matching no numbers or achieving no pattern.

So where did everyone go? Bingo.

Makes total sense to port the low quality version of the game to encourage everyone to pirate the one with more features. Amazing!

okay but like what if we made this game good

I love drugs I love them oh I love them I love them dearly I need them oh how I need them I simply must consume them I simply must I require injection oh yes injection is a must and please oh please do not forget the crippling addiction yes oh yes the crippling addiction is a must but oh do i need the relapse oh pretty please give me the relapse oh how i long for the relapse

sometimes the enemies are a little bit mean

Elden Ring. Oh Elden Ring. My beloved Elden Ring. Where do I begin? If I recall correctly, it all began on launch day. As an avid Miyazaki supporter, I was sure to pre-order the game and viciously slander all of the people who doubted the game online. There was one fellow online who explained to me that "Dark Souls just wasn't his thing" and that "he understands why people like it, but he would rather play a game that he enjoys". Well, when I heard this I just simply could not believe it. I quickly found all of his social media profiles, and realized that he posted a photo of himself at his college. Big mistake buddy. So I did what any real gamer would do and I contacted the college board and told them that this gentleman was actually an incredibly abusive boyfriend, and someone who used racial slurs incredibly frequently. This got him immediately barred from his college, and I followed him online as his life continually went down hill. His family rejected him. His employers fired him. He had nothing left, and soon he became a husk of his former self. I laugh to this day knowing what I did this to man, knowing what he told me that fateful day.

Well anyway, I was patiently waiting on my porch for the mailman to come for what seemed like forever. But when he did arrive, there was not a single package addressed to me. Now this couldn't be possible, so I argued with the mailman that someone had to have done something wrong. I quickly pushed him aside and entered his truck, opening boxes upon boxes until I found a copy of Elden Ring addressed to my neighbor down the road. I snatched it and left the truck, only to be snagged on the collar by the mailman. "The hell are you doing!?" He screamed. I smashed the game over his head, knocking his back momentarily before I tackled him to the ground and brutally beat his face in with the package over and over again. Eventually his skull caved in and he stopped moving, but there was one large problem: The disc had been destroyed in the process. I soon realized that I had used my copy of Elden Ring to end this mans life. I looked around, noticing that there were witnesses all around me, so I quickly ran into the garage and got in my car. Where would I go now? Where COULD I go? My face was visible to everyone, and it was only a matter of time before the cops began looking for me. But I had time, and I had a purpose. I needed Elden Ring.

So off to Best Buy I went, and soon I arrived. I jogged into the store, only to be met with the screams of customers as they looked upon me. Why were they screaming? I looked down, only to realize that my clothes with dripping with the blood of the mailman. I sprinted towards the game section as the employees began to call the police. Elden ring... Where is Elden Ring!? Then it hit me, like a light shining from the heavens above. A single copy of Elden Ring, just for me. I grabbed it and hugged it, blood falling onto the sleeve and all. Now I just had to return home and play the game. This wouldn't be easy, though, as the police had just arrived. I sneaked over to the computer aisle and grabbed an iMac off the shelves, then quietly hid behind one of the shelves. The police entered and began searching the area. In particular, there was one officer all alone near the aisle I was in. I came up behind him and continually slammed the iMac over his head, then grabbed the glock from his holster and shot him in the chest five times.

Well, this alerted all of the police to my location, and a firefight soon occurred. Bullets were traded back and forth, flying throughout the store and destroying precious electronics in the process. It was at that moment I had been shot in the leg, and I fell to the floor. They began to surround me, but not before I took out two more before succumbing to the continuous lead entering my body. I would die with a copy of Elden Ring in my arms, just like Miyazaki intended. It was a perfect way to leave this world. And one day I too will rise as a tarnished.

Good game except for the fact that the developers literally come to your ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ house, beat you to a pulp, and steal all of your money. Every penny. You will have nothing left except your PC and a copy of Hitman III that they so graciously let you keep. You boot up the game. Error: cannot connect to servers. They stole your ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ WIFI, and now you can't play. You have nothing now.

Wow! My pet chicken is also involved in multiple accounts of

Aggravated Assault
Insurance Fraud
Aiding and Abetting / Accessory
Kidnapping
Arson
Involuntary Manslaughter
Assault / Battery
Voluntary Manslaughter
Bribery
Burglary
Money Laundering
Child Abandonment
First-degree Murder
Child Abuse
Second-degree Murder
Computer Crime
Perjury
Conspiracy
Probation Violation
Credit / Debit Card Fraud
Prostitution
Criminal Contempt of Court
Public Intoxication
Cyberbullying
Pyramid Schemes
Disorderly Conduct
Racketeering / RICO
Disturbing the Peace
Domestic Violence
Robbery
Drug Manufacturing and Cultivation
Securities Fraud
Drug Possession
Sexual Assault
Drug Trafficking / Distribution
Shoplifting
DUI / DWI
Solicitation
Embezzlement
Stalking
Extortion
Forgery
Tax Evasion / Fraud
Telemarketing Fraud
Harassment
Theft
Hate Crimes
Vandalism
Homicide
White Collar Crimes
Identity Theft
Wire Fraud
Indecent Exposure