Recent reviews by WillsTownJoe

Just a really fun simulator!

I think the original is a touch more frightening - weirdly enough, because of the nostalgic jank. Make no mistake, it is a very good remake and how you probably should play the game in these modern times.

Also, what's the name of that chapter? ;)

It's a great game, and you should bloody well buy it. Just keep the following in mind: ...

This game fell victim to expectations. Everyone seemed to be expecting a spiritual successor to Dead Space, and if that's what you're after, yes, this will fall short. But you should not compare it to that game.

The Callisto Protocol is best compared to something like Condemned, it's primarily a linear journey focused on "lite" combat that excels at simply being Intense. You don the shoes of Josh Duhamel (Looking bad ass might I say) and wander through a ♥♥♥♥♥♥ up space horror setting while kickin' ass and takin' names (and he's all out of names!)

While the acting is top notch, the story is somewhat basic (and quite predictable), but it's difficult not to be caught up in the sheer intensity of the execution. Literary Genius Quotes of "How Do I know I Can Trust You" and "We Need To Get The Hell Off This Planet" were thrust forward, albeit naturally well given the acting talent, but damn it did I not feel pumped as I beat three enemies with my stun baton in quick succession shortly after. I knew which NPC was going to die in a scene that attempted to make me feel for their plight, which NPC would see it in their heart to overcome their differences with me, and I pretty much expected word for word the done to death monologue of the ultimate villain. But did I look forward to the simplistic combat and expected writing that would take place following each of these moments? Hell yes. Because the "feel" of the game is just there.

TL:DR? If Dead Space never existed, the reviews for this would be far more positive than what they are and I think a lot more people would enjoy it. If you're feeling up for a predictable yet enjoyable thrill ride in the same vein as when you're favourite action star released another one of their movies (back when we actually had decent action movies) then you'll be in for a treat. Just don't expect Dead Space, because it ain't here.

Oh and they've mostly fixed the stuttering issues - turn off V sync and motion blur and you should be sweet!

Disappointed Father Simulator - PC Edition

Pretty much the best game set in the warhammer universe (and most fondly remembered). Unfortunately, the geniuses in charge never realised it, or have sought to capitalise on it and we'll likely never see a sequel.

Highly recommended.

Finished Nier: Gestalt on PS3. Been looking forward to this for a while now. It's not a game, but a perspective altering, mind-f****** experience that will make you question too much, feel hopeless, and stick with you long after you've finished it.

The negative reviews at present consist of people who can't lock their frame-rate in the relevant (AMD/Nvidia) control panel, and games journalists who have had to plough through this thing to get their reviews out. The latter is truly an abhorrent approach to experience this, as it's one of those games that you're meant to lose yourself in. You'll realise that the side-quests are a royal pain in the a***, but then you'll go spend 4 hours fishing just to finish them for a couple of sentences of Yoko Taro's wisdom from one of many fleeting NPCs.

You'll find yourself falling into some dazed trance from the music, growing awfully attached to the characters, and racking your brain for where this is all leading, and you'll never damn well guess.

Most importantly it'll fill in the gaps of Automata, warrant a second playthrough of that game and hours will be wasted in this endless surreal dream.

My only gripe is that I would have preferred them to add in the option to switch between Gestalt and Replicant. Even after just an hour, I very much prefer the old grumpy protagonist of Gestalt, but hey hopefully it's DLC down the road.

P.s Fun Fact, after you finish this and Automata again, you'll once more be faced with the reality that this was all based on the secret ending of a PS2 game that barely anyone played, and only about 4 people finished. :P

Enjoy.

Fun party game.

Drink every time Rourke has Lara dead to rights but then runs away.

Story is atrocious, game play mostly boring, but there's a few moments where Lara goes absolute nutter butters and it's pretty fun.

I feel like there was an epic intriguing story here, but either execs or a lack of resources happened.

Buy it on sale.

It's amazing. First one was good, this just tidies everything up. Be warned, some peeps are getting some optimisation problems, but with a 3090 (lol), I've had no problems :)

*Sigh*

In this day and age no one should really have to say this...but...manage your f'ing expectations...

why do you still believe that a game will be perfect day one?

Game previews are run on super computers with about ten adobe premiere layers...

8 year old consoles are not made for running next gen games...

If a game is sold as too good to be true out of the box...it is...

No Man's Sky, Anthem, Watchdogs 1, Assassin's Creed Unity...and still you believed...

but let's be real...the game was delayed 14 times and you all complained? They release it and you complain that it's not finished...

We live in a capitalistic world...companies are going to lie to you to make money...in fact they have to. This game had a 6 year development cycle, they had pressure from the public and the big companies (Sony, Microsoft) to release, so they can now fix it using your salty tear dollars...the sooner you realise this, the happier you will be.

This shouldn't be a surprise to anyone who actually understand CD Project Red's philosophy but clearly they were forced into releasing before they were ready. They will spend the next 5 years making this game the game they advertised - the proof is in The Witcher 1, 2, and 3, and all of their messaging since release. There will be no microtransactions, free enhancement patches, until they are satisfied with the final product...

As it stands, if you have a 3090 and a Ryzen 9, it runs like a charm. There's still bugs, but I grew up in the age of gaming where this ♥♥♥♥ was a rite of passage. You reload and you keep playing. There are some limitations to how the "RPG" aspects were sold, but again, I'm sure these will be fixed in the future. The story is incredible...the side missions are detailed and immersive...the world is...unfathomable...the whole thing is a spectacular achievement... if you understand...

The irony here is that Johnny Silverhand (Keanu's character) is talking about a lot of you...you who are naive to the ways of the world...

I generally don't like to write reviews with under two hours of playtime...


....but....