Recent reviews by Woofthr

I'm not a coward, I'm just very good at identifying ghosts with the absolute least amount of evidence possible.

I've played the non-steam Wurm Online for many years, and have poured many thousands of hours into Wurm Unlimited so far - Of the two, go for Wurm Unlimited.

Why?
1: You won't have to deal with the devs and staff's behavior.
2: It's a one time payment for life, instead of Wurm Online's subscription model.
3: It's basically the same, depending on what server you join.
4: If you're a casual, there's skill multiplier servers so you won't have to spend too much of your valuable game time grinding for grind's sake.
5: Overall, the community is better, but that's a very subjective claim.
6: Into modding? This is where it's at.
Etc. Etc.

For cons, you miss out on future updates - But the only thing worthy so far that can't be replicated with mods easily is increased render distance and the new renderer in general. But if you come in expecting this game to look great, you're barking up the wrong old-ass tree.

I've played this a fair bit, primarily in Online which will be the sole focus of this review.

Having played this for years, I've put up with a lot of stuff. Between greifers, modders, greifing modders, R* wiping my money for no reason - I'm especially careful to avoid modders giving away cash - and just a generally toxic playerbase... But I put up with it because, at its core, it's an incredibly fun experience with lots to do.

Lately, however... After the Epic free giveaway of the game a while ago, the game has quite literally had at minimum 3 modders per server, and one of them is always a guaranteed ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥. If you stick your neck out in any way, you're going to be ♥♥♥♥♥♥ with, greifed, disconnected to singleplayer or your game will get crashed.

This is because suddenly every previously banned modder can get a FREE or VERY CHEAP account easily, and those who did get it for free don't give a damn if they get banned. Coupled with mod menu creators aggressively marketing their menus via Social Club (I've gotten 3-4 different random messages that are essentially ads, "feel like a god!" seems to be a popular tagline.) and you've got Online as of late. It has NEVER been this bad.

Over the course of the last couple weeks, I have been lucky to complete any public session event, mission or just plain having fun with people without a mod greifer interrupting in some way. Fight back effectively? Disconnected. Hide/go passive? Like that has ever helped. They can even stick objects on you that last between sessions - Sometimes obscuring your view completely requiring a full game restart.

"Do a public solo session!" I hear you whine.

Yes, this works somewhat for missions and sales, when you need to make money. But what if you just want to ♥♥♥♥ around with other players, the main attraction of the game for me - Or do PvP against the unceasing horde of tryhard MKII bike greifers, a common complaint I actually find fun to take down? ♥♥♥♥ out of luck for the foreseeable future, as R* is and has been notoriously bad at dealing with this issue historically (and it's never been this bad!).

On top of all this, a thing that's always been a small issue in the past is rearing its head big time lately - Inability for your game to sync up and "save" your progress on the servers. There's nothing like spending an evening grinding money/crates/vehicles/heists for nothing because the game decided it didn't want to save it. No, forcing R*s servers to prioritize it by quit-not-quitting doesn't seem to work consistently, and this happens every night.

I've been willing to put up with a lot in the past, I'm not some carebear money high score grinder, I don't care about K/D ratios or any of that ♥♥♥♥. But being completely unable to play without getting disconnected for daring to exist outside of a heist or public solo lobby is completely unbearable. Even when I find a smallish session and start to have fun, it's never more than 20 min to half an hour before it's ruined again by an egocentric kid who threw 20 bucks at a mod menu.

You won't - Can't - fix it, so just ♥♥♥♥ you R* for being completely inept moneygrubbing ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ for years, doing your best to ruin any fun you can have in this game.

EDIT: No, I won't get a mod menu. You guys are exactly what I'm complaining about, having more people trying to boot off eachother just makes the problem worse. Not to mention a lot of the "better" mod menus come with DC protection from those same methods anyways.

EDIT2: 276 game hours later...
Mod menus are so powerful that they'll intercept ingame reports, and they can spoof their names so you can't report them out-of-game either. The worst ones are the "good guy" modders trying to play vigilante crashing or messing with people they think deserve it; But half the time they get it wrong and only see the greifer getting his just desserts and assume you're the bad guy.

ON TOP of that, if they save your R* ID they can pull you in and out of sessions on command, so you're literally never safe if one sees fit to ♥♥♥♥ with you specifically.

I'm not crying, you're crying.

Stupid, fragile animals :(

It wouldn't be a lie to say Boneworks is currently the best VR experience out there currently.

But I hope it becomes a baseline/standard setter for the genre much like doom, or half life was for shooters. As it's still very much a basic game - hilariously fun because everything is physics, including bodies, but still feels like there is a lot more to explore with VR's potential.

Either way, it will be remembered fondly as one of the first big groundbreaking titles.

100% percent worth it, accidentally ruined my day by staying up 'till 3 AM playing this stupid high quality game.

Lots of content, great design, challenging with high replayability (I haven't finished it, but I'll keep throwing myself at it for sure.)

Reminds me a little of spelunky, but that game never caught my interest the same as this one.

It just keeps suprising me with more stuff.

It's okay, definitely overhyped though.

Finished it in [whatever my game time is] and thought the end was kinda cheesy. Did like the visuals of scurry nanobutt guy when he wasn't in the brightly lit areas of the endgame.

Jumpscares were cheap, as usual. Most of the tension was in the beginning few encounters, after that it's 100% "when is the next unavoidable jumpscare".

5/10 - Not for that pricetag.

Still fun and challenging, in spite of the obviously dated design.

I went crazy trying to find this game from my childhood over the years, I couldn't remember the title so I manually went through every "games in existence" list I could find, asked in a lot of "games you've forgotten" threads on every conceiveable forum trying to describe this odd, obscure strategy game to no avail.

... Then suddenly it pops up on the Steam store, with no warning or fanfare. I need a drink.

I've masturbated a lot less since I got back into Wurm.

I am quite frankly really disappointed in Kingdoms and Castles, it has so much potential to be a great game with relatively few changes (in my opinion.)

The game is not difficult enough, for starters. And I don't mean send more and larger enemies at me. It needs greater complexity in its economy management and necessitate more thought being put into your city as it expands.

As it currently stands I reached an endgame where I effectively controlled everything, had every building, and repelled every attack with 1k+ citizens in roughly 3 hours with no real feeling of wanting to go back and trying something different. The only things I feel I could change are the aesthetics - Where you put your farms as opposed to buildings of various kinds matters incredibly little as long as they are under the watchful eye of a guard tower or behind your walls (wall aside from an external one feeling completely useless).

Aquaducts and walls are not dynamic enough to allow for any sort of creativity, and they generally feel limiting (and ugly). Traders, too, were a huge disappointment with their small amount of wares, no way of setting up regular trading nor do they carry anything special.