Recent reviews by Manadono (Baron Bacardi™)

bamboo uncuttable, dodge roll broken. LITERALLY UNPLAYABLE

Falsely advertised. Avoid.

thank you valve, still need a refund though
https://www.change.org/p/hello-games-compensation-for-no-man-s-sky-players


Consider:
-Rodina
-Starforge
-Space Engineers
-Minecraft
-Star Citizen
-reporting them to the Advertising Standards Agency

RIP Payday 2

I got this game in a humble bundle years ago., if you don't own this game yet, you are missing out by miles.



I have since sampled the other pixeljunk games and I conclude that this is their magnum opus.

The game itself is simple in its operation: jumping, spinning, web-slinging and ground (or sky) pounding your way through an Eden of sound. The more life you spread through the area, the more intense the music becomes, the higher your score gets. The interplay between light and sound in this game is simple, pure and effective, making what might otherwise be a monotonous game into a true gaming gem. The artful style of this game shines high above pixeljunk shooter's comparably infantile gameplay and the overly simple faced pixeljunk monsters. But the style alone does not make it great, the gameplay too is razor sharp. Simple controls allow for intuitive movement through the levels, using momentum and quick reflexes to reach speeds and heights neccesary to awaken the furthest reaches of each garden. The control of the game allows anyone to get into the game proper, and ride the difficulty curve as they please. This is a fairly low-stress game, as long as you keep an eye out for nasties and try not to fall all the way back down, you'll find very little pressure from the game to be fast, or efficient. There is a draining health bar, but suppliments are so common in-game it serves most purpose during combat. It does also create that special spark of drama, leaving a combat on low health and half-way up a garden, and urging you to find more dust quickly. The soundtrack is also one of the best I've heard in a good long while, featuring cool and relaxed electronic music, that provides enough rhythmic backbone without being overly intense or dramatic. The game as a whole is fairly clean from modern gaming cliche and is a welcome change from pretty much everything.

So, if you are looking to relax into a hypnotic electronic music arcade game art world from an arena of high-maintenence, major league, time-limited, bland and corporate gaming, Pixeljunk Eden is the game you need to buy.




PS, it has world and friend ranked leaderboards if you didn't want to relax ;>

This is the best film I've seen all week... and I saw Fury Road.

Pandemonium is a 2.5D action platformer. Pandemonium is hard as nails. You know this. You bought this game in the mid-90s for your grey slab and you loved it. I know this well because I was you, and I still am.

The only reason you're here is because you saw your childhood (or adolescenthood w/e) was put up in the shopfront and ported to your shiney game tower format. So did I. But do not let its looks deceive you! This version of the game is a straight, low reolution, low-poly, lo-fi, exact replica of the Playstation classic. This is why it is bad. This is why you shouldn't buy it. You already have the disc, and you probably have at least a PS2 you can run it on. Go do that. Or rip your BIOS from your console and emulate the game. But do not buy this. not for £2, not for £1. Not even for the £0.69 I was on sale for last month.

The main problem with this game is control. PCs have 1000000000000000000000000000's of options for controllers. you can use anything from an 8 button fightstick to a 109 key Keyboard, with pads, joysticks, flightsticks, lightguns, keyboards (MIDI this time) etc in between. Although the game received my Motioninjoy xbox360 pad input OK, the button mappings were way off, all over the place! UNACCEPTABLE! This problem is joined onto the next; buttonpresses and keystrokes are not always registered. Being a game with doublejump, only registering a doublejump every third of fourth try is no good. no good at all. Although it brings back cheery memories of being bad at this game when I was 7, I'm only bad at this game now because the game doesn't respond,

Very Fustrating.

There are also no options in game for sound levels. no master, no music, no SFX. nada. If you want pandemonium to be quiet you have to (sacrifice a small goat and pray to your God) alt-tab, and then alter the levels in the windows sound manager. And then (sacrafice another goat...) alt-tab back.

Now let's talk about the glorious retro graphics. Being a bad port the game is available in one of four very small, very strange resolutions. three of which will crash the DirectDraw application the software goes through. The one that works, and it is very shaky, will look bad. I am the kind of guy who complains about a 960p upscale resolution, and some people will cast that comment aside. But imagine upscaling an analog monitor's grainy, pixelly, 700px wide display onto a screen almost 3x the size. please take a moment to think about how this looks. it's like watching a 240p film on youtube. vbad.

This writing has caused me to start losing good grammar so the rest will just be pros and cons.

pros
+fast way to waste excess money
+you can own pandemonium on your PC
+retro nostalgia

cons
-fast way to waste excess money
-you can buy CSGO keys instead of this
-buggy DirectDraw launcher and DX handler
-poor controller compatibility
-no config menus for anything
-bad button response
-nothing is remastered
-shaky alt-tabbing

In summary, go just get your old PSX, PS1 or PS2 and this disc and play it, or use your BIOS and epsxe to emulate your PS1 with some GFX upgrades, like smoothed textures, extended rendering and 1080p resolutions. This here, is a minor cashgrab and is partially forgivable given it's cost, but totally not worth it.

Think!
Don't ruin your childhood memories.

Game 7/10
Port 3/10

Okay, I love Wipeout. I love F-zero. And this game is a PC based melding pot of the two. For no charge even! I was totally stoked to get this on my HDD and batter the transistors out of opponent racers. And wow, for a week or so it was great. Pretty much all I could have expected from a F2P Wipeout clone. The pros of this game are many, but they are only the pros of Wipeout and would do this title no real service. Instead the cons of the game;

-Extremely eager airbrakes
-Partially broken jump and hover physics
-Freemium currency and currency only items
-The first place fanfare song is a bit funny
-Jumping, Rubberbanding and other latency issues (we will come back to this)

Besides these points the game was playable and... Fun I dare to add. It featured recharge pads from F-zero and boost plates and pickups from Wipeout. There is both inner and outer pipe-riding, big air, over water gliding and rough track zones too. The level design is sparkly and there's a progression of tiered machines to drive. The core game can only really grow from these strengths. Surely?

But as I mentioned the problems with server latency, after only a short stint of enjoyment, the servers were taken down for 'emergency maintenance'. I checked back the next day, and yet the servers were still down. I checked a week later and still no response. I checked last week, nearly a month later and still no signs of recovery. Except, a news update stating they were merging Quantum Rush Online with Quantum Rush Champions. No more free multiplayer (I assume), and at about £5 during the sale I can safely say I won't be returning. I have Wipeout, I have F-zero, and I have X-treme G racing already.

To be sure, there is no real PC based competitor to this, and I'm sure the Champions version is great and all, but the kerfuffle just leaves me wondering if it's even worth it?

VERDICT – Just go play Wipeout.

Never has this game failed to entertain me. The standard multiplayer bringing its well polished sheen to the table with a balanced range of guns and powerups in some of the most well designed arena levels the world has ever seen. Then the instagib servers quench any thirst left for possibly the fastest twitch shooting out there. Grab your railgun and get gibbing ;3

couldn't ask more from a freemium game. worth a bash

[EDIT]

Well, I couldn't have asked for more until this last update.

It was a player friendly freemium title, where most functional items could be bought permanently with in-game currency earned by owning noobs (or being owned by pros). Of course, this marketing strategy doesn't make nearly as much projected gross income as charging for a premium pass to be able to unlock an item with in game coins.

Thankfully, it seems that anyone who played the game before the update was gifted this pass for being a loyal subscriber. And to the people I was in the game with earlier, thanks I found my character again.

There has been no attempt at fixing the agregious memory leak bugs in the game, rendering several maps and gamemodes unplayable on machines with less RAM than 8GB. Before the patch, at least there was a ramp of memory going missing, and the game would be somewhere near stable for an hour or two.

Also, I have had a glitch where I spawn in some kooky 3rd person camera mode, with an invisible player model and a frozen camera angle. I can move about as normal, but the camera will not turn or yaw.

Another bug yet, the bloom and light ray intensity of the sun is so much that it affects the translucency of the player model in 1st person. I could see straight through my gun and heck it put me off.

Also recoil has been all but removed, making assault rifles sniperlicious. I was assured that the PC standard recoil was coming back at the weeks end, but I am skeptical.

All in all, the latest patch has driven a train into the customer pool, aesthetics and my interest in this game. It just gets cheaper and more broken with each update. Please, stop fixing things that aren't broken and address the memory issues.




PS. does anyone remember playing escort missions on that really small map, when the game was hard as all goodness? the game was pretty good back then.

awawawawawawawawawawwawawawawawawawawawawawa

[EDIT]


400 hours of Civ IV later, I can still recommend this to you, I have not gone insane. It's a classic turn-based empire game with real charm, character and a grammy winning theme song. Voiced by Lenard Nimoy, and emblazoned with the Sid Meier's logo, this game is almost a must own for any self respecting human being.

Although, some people might think that this game is slow and boring. And yes, if you play on marathon mode, or long mode or even normal mode, you can satisfy a whole week's worth of game time in just one save file.

But, and this but is a Nicki Minaj scale but, turn the turn speed up to quick, set the world size to small, with random terrain generation and a full house of 16 civs, and watch your hour-or-so long chaotic power struggle ensue.

Of course, if you were looking for a more epic game, the RevDCM mod pack alongside one of the larger scale earth maps, or a huge scale random map, will set you up for one of the most enjoyable empire building sim game experiences you can get.

To round up, a flexible game with stunning audio, that can be tailored and played to pretty much anyone's needs. A great game and worth picking up.